Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Writer's Block

A photographic mistake but it reflects my lack of focus.
I have hit a roadblock.  I have been writing about Gabe's journey for years.  I started taking notes and writing when we still didn't have a diagnosis.

I wrote because it is what I do.  I write.

About 10 years ago, I decided I should write a book about what we learned helping Gabe overcome his autism.  I knew we had advantages that most do not.  I wanted to share the wisdom of my parents and others.

Now that Gabe is in high school and is doing wonderfully, I can seriously think about finishing the book.  Until now, I could not expect anyone to seriously believe I had something of value to say.  Gabe has exceeded all of my expectations.  When he now tells me he wants to move to New York City and be the CEO of a large bank, I believe he can.  I also think he should think about being the chairman of the Federal Reserve.  He can do it.

So why am I having such difficulty writing?

I am afraid I will sound pompous and arrogant.  I don't have all the answers but I do have some.  We had advantages that others in our situation don't have.

What I have to say will not be popular with many people.  I think many of our programs do more harm than good.  It is a problem in special education and in general education.  We have lost our perspective.  We focus on minutia and lose sight of what should be our goals.

I have to finish this.

There were no miracle cures for Gabe.  It was hard work and determination.  I believe others can also achieve the same level of independence.

I used to worry incessantly about Gabe's future.  Who would take care of him once I died?  I no longer worry about his future.  I fully expect he will be taking care of me in my old age.